It's been an emotional roller coaster ride since the project ended. Have been at the receiving end of all the positive and negative feedbacks. I am not resisting negative feedbacks but just that some of them are simply unfair judgements. It hurts to know it is coming from someone that I have known for the past 2 years. I think I have a part to play, escaping from him since it all begun. I am trying to face up to him but doesn't seem to have enough courage to do so. What a coward I can be when it comes to such stuff! Will continue to hate myself until I face up to him!

Challenge your Limits 2007 is finally over! A huge load of my mind.

This has been one amazing journey that I will truly savour.

Looking back, one year has gone by so swiftly. Last year, at this time of the year, I was busy recruiting members and followed closely by all the canvassing efforts. The mooncake horror was one that I will never forget! And now, everything is over! Saying bye to the past...

I cannot even recall the number of times I cried due to the stress and fears that mount handling such a large project that involves so many parties, all with their own vested interest. At some point of time, things just went so wrong that I just wanted to walk off from the situation. My emotional capacity almost reached the maximum trashold quite a few times. Reflecting back, I have really grown up a lot both mentally and emotionally. This journey in CurL has forced me to grow up real fast.

This journey has also brought along with it a bunch of good friends who stood by me throughout the course. Without their support, I think Avy would have crumpled long time ago. Here's a pic of my wonderful CurL'07 committee members and some random photos on that day!

I have just made up my mind and I am going to stick by it. My head won the war in the end, though I do not know why my heart feels kind of uncomfortable. But I still believe it's a wise decision I have made.

I am going to be selfish for once and put myself before others. My health has been taking the toll of all the stress and workload that I have been going through for the past one year. Within these 3 months of holidays, I have fallen sick twice. My rashes are still annoying me. My emotional health is not any better, having always to feel that I got no one to share my uncomfort as I do not want to be a burden. I think I have given my best to the club and the school, and I am walking away with no regrets. I do not care if I am going to step down in glory, but I know that I have not disappointed myself and the people around me. That's what is of utmost priority to me now.

To be fair to others, I also need to give the people around me a break. They have walked me through this one year, and I really do not want to trouble any more people again. I do feel sorry for all that I put others' through, but I am not doing it on purpose. I just need to pour them out before I go nuts. Too much unforseen stuff took place within a short span of a year, and I am still learning to cope. My first relationship, my first major project...

On a good note, CurL is coming in 9 days time! Very excited! I believe it will be the most wonderful moment that I will never forget in my life. Once again, Avy is standing alone on her island, keeping her fingers crossed that everything will go by smoothly.

Happy 42nd Birthday Singapore! Celebrating a city of possibilities!

My energy level is hitting low again. It had been a tiring day at school with 2 meetings and work to be cleared when I get home. My throat has been hurting since morning. Feeling feverish again. I think I may really have to see a doctor tomorrow already. Gosh! Avy hates seeing the person in white!

The pressure is mounting as the event is only 3 weeks away. It doesn't help when I still need to solve some committee problems that sprung up during the meeting today. Hia.. Human relationships are just so complex. I need to be more level-headed! I am seriously not having any more energy to settle such stuff at this juncture. Let's pray that all will go well. Having the jitters. I was doing some self reflection today, and have concluded that I think I have really failed in many ways. My flaws are becoming more obvious as I progress on... My poor human management, poor stress management, poor health... Argh...

I am also at the juncture of making an important decision. In fact, I never thought it was that important until everyone keeps imposing on me the idea that I am about to make a major decision in my life. My heart is telling me something, and my head is telling me something else. So let's see which one wins ultimately! One of it is winning now...

Managed to watch Simpsons yesterday with kj. The show was not bad. Worth the watch!

Shall go and rest... :) Do join me in my slumberland.