Happy Leap Year to all. It comes only once every 4 years, which calls for some kind of celebration. I spent 29th Feb at work but it ended off with a good note, meeting up with my darling Nana.

And its Friday again! I am so happy.

So much hard work for the past months and bust! The feeling is kind of horrible. People can be really unappreciative of things that you do for them. I guess that's reality- that's life! I am just letting each day slip by me. Though unsure of what lies ahead, I am trying to be positive and be happy. I really need my smile back.

Finally, I got the chance to view the video taken for Marina Bay Challenge. The CD had been lying in my cupboard for the longest time and I happened to chance upon it when I was compiling some reports. It was a one hour video that summed up all the hard work for the past one year for the event. It was nice having those wonderful memories coming back gradually. Till now, I am still filled with so much pride when I talk about CurL. I really hope to walk through CurL'08 but time and energy is really not on my side. I knock off late, then rush home and begin working on WSC stuff and as the energy in me saps away, I feel my bed beckoning me towards it. Weekends are no better. Family commitments, PI report, WSC meetings are just some of the many things that I do during the weekends. And before I know it, weekends are over and I am back to the routine at office. It's been 2 months and I have 4 more to go...Counting down :(

I really wish to kick away the negativities that have been building up in me. I have been telling myself that I should stop bottling up my unhappiness and pretend that everything is fine. I just need an avenue to pour things out, a listening ear. Maybe my darling blog can be. Why do I need to keep tolerating such nonsense from people. I am already trying my very best! Behind my strong front, I do need some form of comfort and assurance. I have been crying for the past few nights and I think it is enough. I never felt that if I cry, I am weak. It is just my way of pouring things out. I am going to let go and move on. I need my smile back and I am going to find the person who has taken it away and demand it back. I believe my smile is my greatest gift and I am not allowing anyone to take it away from me.

Avy smile! Everyone smile!

What Aveline Chiok Means

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality. You are very hyper. You never slow down, even when it's killing you. You're the type of person who can be a workaholic during the day... and still have the energy to party all night. Your energy is definitely a magnet for those around you. People are addicted to your vibe. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together. You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is. You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals. You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily. You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind. A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable. You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out. Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia. Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person. You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life. You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you. At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself. You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life. You are also a keeper of knowledge - meaning you don't spill secrets or spread gossip. People sometimes think you're snobby or aloof, but you're just too deep in thought to pay attention to them.

I do not know what is happening to me recently.

My mood swings like it has never been before and they are extremes. For a moment, I can be feeling really happy but the next moment, I am all upset and miserable. I am been breaking down into tears recently, and I am really crying for no specific reason. My tears just flow uncontrollably. I cannot seem to be able to pin point the root of why I am feeling this way recently.

One possible reason could be cause of my mum. For the past months, she has been very upset with her boss and at work. And she pours everything out to me almost every night. I understand the pain that she is going through but I cant seem to be able to help her alleviate her problem. The more I hear, the more upset I feel. She is intending to quit some time in June and that may possibly be the best solution since she is so unhappy at work.

Aside to my emotional roller coaster, every night has been rather busy. All the WSC publicity stuff has been taking up quite a bit of my time. I think as a VP, I have tried my best and I shall allow people to criticize if they want to. I cant possibly please the whole world.

I know its getting boring that I am going to lament about work. But I am so angry that I really need to pour out everything here.

I couldn't believe I got sarcastically told off by this irritating media owner. Who does she think she is! Irritating bitch! Yeah. I know I shouldn't be saying such stuff but I cant help it. I don't usually use such crude words but I am indeed boiling! She could not meet the deadline and still have the cheek to tell me off. I told her off by telling her that if she couldn't get back on the date that she agreed to, at least have the courtesy to inform me. That's her responsibility, not mine. I am just simply doing my job. And yeah... She said she will get back to me by today and she did not. See. What an idiot.

And knowing my temper, I won't be making her life easy for the subsequent months. Just a low ranking staff and she thinks of a world of herself. Thinking of her makes me mad. I guess it has much to do with her knowing that I am an intern. So irritating! I hate being an intern. People simply think lowly of you. But thats true to a large extent.. Lowly paid, poorly recognized. Even your pay comes late because the amount is too negligible.

Feeling irritated. I need some ice water to cool myself down.

It was a wonderful night with my T09 darlings! Take good care of yourself Terence! See you again when you are back!

It's been a tough week at work with work piling up and constantly at the receiving end of people's nonsense. I feel so helpless and frustrated when people keep pressurizing me from all ends and I am the one that gets screamed at for things that is not even my within my control. And how I wish ppl could stop pushing their problems unto me. They make it my problem, but I cant make it others cause the problem ends at me. Came home on Wednesday and cried but definitely felt much better after that. I managed to discharge a whole load of frustration that has been bottling inside me for the longest time. Oh, and I finally received my January's pay after so long! I feel quite shortchanged with that amount that I am getting but I guess I do not have a choice since I am just a lowly intern... hahaha...

Went for the 9th Hitachi Young Leaders Initiative interview yesterday and it was one nerve wrecking experience. Faced with a panelist of 5, I was constantly shot with questions, of which some really put me in the spot. The questions were rather tough and I dont think I well. Hmm, at least I was one of the 10 people who were shortlisted. Though, a large part of me is hoping that I do not get it. Shall see.

My 2nd V day was romantic and memorable. We had dinner at a restaurant called Red, White and Pure. Though we waited more than an hour for the food due to some hiccups in the kitchen, I have to say that it was worth the wait because the food was really good. Coupled with a good ambience, my V day was perfect!

These 5 days have gone by so quickly! Argh...

Well, I had all the fun this CNY. For once, I won money from black jack! Every year, I gamble during CNY, but lose money. This year, I won 4 dollars! :) Not forgetting all the good food. Some pics to sum it all up.

I am back by popular demand... hahaha.. Michelle is my no. one fan!!! Hugs to my dearest Michelle.

Finally, the 5 days break is here. I have been longing for this break since I started work. My life has fallen into some kind of a monotony since work started. Waking up at 7.30, head to work, work, wait for lunch time, work and hope that 6pm will come real quickly. I guess that is the kind of life we have to go through once we graduate. Some how, I feel that I have been trusted with a considerable amount of responsibility and I do feel nervous at times. I am still grappling with media terms, costings calculation and analyzing of data.

Fortunately, I have a nice supervisor and colleague who are really nice to me. Well, but good things have to come to an end one day. After March, one is leaving and the other one will be changing team. Hia... So sad. It's been wonderful working with them. And I really dread having to work with *someone*. I think *someone* is going to think I am stupid cause *someone* thinks he/she is really smart. I really think it is unfair that he grades me cause he hasnt seen how I work! Alright, I have let out my bottled feelings and I feel better now.

Class outing last Friday night to celebrate Rachel and Yong Chun's bday was real fun! It was the biggest class gathering we've had. It's also one of the rare times that all the five guys came!! We made so much noise that it was really hard for others not to notice us...hahaha... After all these years, T09 remains united and I am grateful for them. Avy loves all of you!!
































WISHING ALL OF YOU A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! MAY THE RAT YEAR BRINGS LOTSA HAPPINESS!